BLACKS. Two guys. And I think a drum machine. They rock out. No, make that they spazz out. One guy is Steve. He’s okay. Kind of tall. Another guy- Keith, too. He’s probably okay. He plays bass. No, pronounced “base”. They write songs. They sound like songs. They also travel in a van. One of them probably lives down by the river. Wait- maybe they both do. They’re loud. Kind of obnoxious. They wouldn’t be here without Steve’s nationwide discount on hotel beds. Or Big Black. Wait. It wasn’t Big Black. They don’t really sound like them. Maybe a little. In the 10k range. See, Steve’s voice is only audible to cats. And toddlers. They still have hearing up to 20k probably. Steve’s down to 150 Hz. I think they put out a couple of things. An album. Some ep. They said they’re going away. Fine. But they’ll be back. I don’t know Keith. He sounds cool. — Ernest